"MASTER OF ALL THINGS CHAOTIC"

Really, really shouldn't tell people that I don't work. It's a lie. What I do should take an army. But it's just me.

Hear is a job description of the duties of Valerie

1.)Raise two girls. One of which is 14 years old, coming into her own, and can utter the words "I love you Mommy" while her eyes really say "I'm going to kill you in your sleep". The other being 5 years old, is sweet, loving and rambunctious, so rambunctious that being in the same room with her drains every bit of energy you have. But, I love them both dearly and am happy to have the honor of being their mother.
2.)Accountant. For our personal life as well as our business. This includes your basic bill paying as well as reconciling 4 bank accounts, filing monthly, quarterly, and annual tax returns, and payroll.
3.) Supervisor of our store. This includes riding the ass of my manager, making my staff shake in their boots at the site of me, working in the store a little, maintaining required paperwork, ensuring the store's operation and profitability as well as the balance between my store and corporate.
4.) Personal shopper for a family of four humans and three dogs.
5.) Laundry Fairy.
6.) Personal Chef.
7.) Nursemaid to sometimes sick husband. (Really not that hard, if he doesn't feel good, he just goes to sleep.)
8.) Taxi Driver.
9.) Half-ass Maid.
10.) Etc. Etc.

I'm sure you get the gist of it all, I'm just feeling a little stressed, but it's fine.
Perhaps my job title should be "MASTER OF ALL THINGS CHAOTIC"